「夜回り先生」

2006年08月22日

「ドラッグを憎め！！」と金八先生が、涙と鼻水を流しながら３回続けて絶叫したTVシーンは、今でも忘れられない。しかしこの本で読んだ「夜回り先生」こと水谷修氏の悩み、苦しむ姿は、それ以上に沈痛な読後感を私に残した。

水谷先生は、定時制高校の教師だ。麻薬中毒に苦しむ少女「ジュン」との文通を通じ、ジュンを支え、麻薬から遠ざけようとする。

しかしジュンは、ますます麻薬に深入りしていく。危機感を持った水谷先生は、悩みながら、ジュンの住所を麻薬取締官に通報する。ジュンは７ヶ月間を、少年院で過ごした。水谷先生は、「自分が少女を裏切った」という罪悪感に苛まれる。

少年院を出た少女に、水谷先生は「自分が通報したのだ」と告白した。ジュンは、信頼していた水谷先生に「裏切られた」ことを知り、「知りたくなかった…」と落胆した。その後、ジュンは再度麻薬に手を出した。

水谷先生の言葉である。

「君に、私が君を司法の手に渡したことを話したことが、良かったのか悩んでいます。知らせてしまうことで、君をもっと哀しみの底へと追い込んでしまったのではないか心配です。もしかすると私は、自分に正直でいたいという自己満足だけのために君に話したのではないか、自分の心を見つめ直しています。」

通常は直面する必要のない苦しい状況に、敢えて我が身を置いている水谷先生。一方で、水谷先生ほど厳しい問いを、自分の心に投げかけることもなく安易に終了した、自分の今日の一日だった。

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